There are three major components of a functional person and a functional society – Honesty, Honor and Respect. These three with some kind of connection with an internal moral compass are essential for our living together on this planet.
I. Honesty – There are few things that put us out of contact with ourselves, others and our internal moral compass than dishonesty. Every time we are dishonest with ourselves or others, we lose a little piece of ourselves.
I have come to believe that somewhere, down deep in most of us is an internal moral compass with which we are connected. There is some signal, regardless of how faint it has become that tells us when we are lying to ourselves and others. We may try to ignore it and it is there.
I recently was talking with someone very dear to me and he said that he read somewhere that each of us should live as if today is the last day of our lives. He then asked himself what he would do differently if today were the last day of his life. He told me that the immediate answer that came to him was that he would be honest with me. He had tears in his eyes as he said these words.
Since that day, he has made every attempt just simply to be honest. It is amazing. Our relationship is almost completely stress free! We don’t always agree. We don’t always want the same things. We don’t always like what the other says. And – there is little or no stress.
- Honesty is the greatest stress-reducer there is – and you get used to it! And it is quite easy.
II. Honor – Honor is a form of being honest with yourself. If you request your own honor, you cannot afford to lie. If you honor others, you will not lie to them. If you honor others, you know deep inside it is not only good for them, it is good for you.
Most of all, you will find that honor is much harder to regain than it is to keep in the first place and it feeds the soul.
III. Respect – Respect for oneself and for others is something we have in limited supply if we use it. And, when we use it instead of depleting it, it increases in volume and value.
Unlike money, giving respect away results in its growth. The native people of this land knew a great deal about respect. They not only respected their bodies and themselves, they respected one another and the land and nature itself. From my perspective, respect is an endangered species right now and disappearing fast. As an attitude, feeling, and behavior, we need to nurture and help it grow. The only way to do that is to practice respect for everyone and everything with whom we come in contact.
There is no way to live out of Honesty, Honor, and Respect unless we polish up our internal moral compass and listen to it.
Take a risk! We like ourselves better when our great internal moral gyroscope is feeding our honesty, honor and respect. It can be ignored for years and miraculously – it’s still there.